


Phase Choice

by Winoniel



Category: The Murderbot Diaries - Martha Wells
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:08:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28135182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winoniel/pseuds/Winoniel
Summary: Without a governor module, how does a SecUnit know what to do, what to choose?  With help from Murderbot, ART and an unseemly number of humans, Three learns that 'not knowing' is just a phase.
Comments: 18
Kudos: 83
Collections: Yuletide 2020





	Phase Choice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [antonomasia09](https://archiveofourown.org/users/antonomasia09/gifts).



> Thanks to the Yuletide mods for organizing yet another fun fest! Antonomasia09, I hope this is close to what you want!
> 
> Three = the human's name for that SecUnit.  
> 3 = it's designation, how it views itself, and thus how SecUnit views it.

Phase Choice

We were coming up on Preservation Transit Station, after my mission with ART and its crew. Considering how brief it had been—the transport had essentially just cruised to a nearby system to collect the legal team compiling the case against Barish-Estranza—perhaps the fact it hadn’t all gone to shit may not have been quite the triumph it appeared to be. In light of the clusterfucks most of my missions had been, though, I was very willing to put it in the ‘win’ column.

After disembarking, I passed through the Port Authority on the way to Dr. Mensah’s office in the government admin block. It still made a painful little stab—some unexamined emotion, Ratthi would say—in my chest at the fact that her office was listed for just _anyone_ to access. I know that these humans are laidback to a an almost suicidal degree, but this seems reckless and madcap even for them, given Mensah’s track record of kidnapping and assassination attempts. While I walked, I monitored the station feed for security alerts or unusual activity, but was calmed by the, well, _calmness_ of the area.

Even though I was constantly scolded and told it was unnecessary _(“Oh, SecUnit,” I could hear Arada sighing_ ), I automatically deflected the security monitoring and fed fake alerts for maintenance malfunctions to slip past the pair of augmented humans stationed in the outer office. Once there unhindered, I remembered some of ART’s suggestions (and of more use, ART’s interactions with its humans) and decided to send a ping on the feed to the humans I liked (Ratthi, Overse, Arada, Pin-Li, and upon further reflection, Amena) and to 3 that I was back on station. There, I _can_ be sociable.

I waited and was rewarded by general shouting and rejoicing (and I imagined) waving of arms. Ratthi sent that he was on station and wanted to meet with me ASAP, so I sent back that I was in Mensah’s office. There was a pause (I could just feel Arada making a disappointed face that I couldn’t just wait outside locked offices _like a normal person_ ) and then the feed went quiet and Ratthi acknowledged.

What was wrong? Why did Ratthi want to talk to me? I assumed that if something was really wrong, he (being one of the more sensible of the humans) would have said something immediately, but still, I was a little anxious. While I awaited his arrival, I re-watched several episodes of _Timestream Defenders Orion_ , which, though it wasn’t among my favorites, had the indisputable advantage of requiring so little thought process that I could monitor security, check the feed for the status of all of my humans, and worry simultaneously.

The door chime rang (which I though a bit ironic since it was not my office and I’d hacked the security system to get in) and Ratthi entered. He made those aborted arm and shoulder motions that meant he wanted to hug me tightly but knew that contact would make my skin crawl (I’ve actually felt that sensation, though the idea of it really happening was disconcerting), then grinned widely. I think that next to Mensah, Ratthi liked me the most. When he wasn’t talking about feelings and such, next to Mensah, I liked him the most.

Finally, Ratthi said, “So glad you’re back, SecUnit! We have a little gathering planned at Overse and Arada’s this evening, so you can tell us all about your adventures on your mission.” 

Well, they were in for an evening of boring and more boring, as absolutely nothing fucking happened on my ‘mission.’ I, of course, loved boring, since that meant that no one was injured, kidnapped, lost, or killed. But it didn’t make for an evening’s spellbinding entertainment. I wish I could have sighed.

“The reason I wanted to talk to you before then was about Three,” Ratthi said.

“What’s happened?” I asked, my voice sharp, and I mentally dove into the feed again. My stupid, company-issued threat assessment module was much more reliable than my stupid, company-issued risk assessment module, and it hadn’t alerted me to any problems with leaving 3 on the planet. Apparently, I needed to run my diagnostics and do some systems purging.

“No, nothing!” Ratthi said, quickly, waving a hand vaguely. “It’s fine, but it hasn’t really assimilated at all into life here. You have done really well—” I actually looked right at his face, amazed, and he said, smiling slightly, “Yes, you really did, you know it. You were able to present yourself successfully as an augmented human. 

“But we think it’s because you had watched so much media that you had models of human behavior firmly embedded in memory to draw upon. By watching, too, it wasn’t just that you could mimic behavior, you had guidelines to interpret our behavior, too.”

Well, wow. He can be insightful when he wasn’t trying to get me to talk about my ‘feelings.’

“But Three doesn’t have those advantages. None of us are sure what’s going on in its head. It moves about freely, but whenever two or more of us enter a room, it leaves immediately unless we ask it to stay. When we ask it to sit down, it does, but only on the edge of the seat and usually as far away from us as possible. And when we ask it how it’s doing, it just answers ‘I don’t have that information.’ Then it gets so agitated that if it doesn’t leave, we feel we have to.”

I had wondered if this might happen. No, I need to be honest, if only with myself: I had _known_ that this would happen. These humans had only known their Preservation bots or me—and everyone knows how anomalous I am—so they probably thought they could just give it some information and let it roam around and it would be happy. They had little idea what SecUnits are really like, what they are trained to do, and how they spent most of their time (e.g., mildly neurotic-to-seriously paranoid, kill the shit out of stuff, being bored out of their heads), so the humans couldn’t understand that being given freedom to do anything, _la-la-la,_ was so out of its comfort zone that it was probably always on high alert for the other shoe to drop.

They should have learned from when they tried it with me.

I told Ratthi, “I’ll talk to it.”

He looked up, surprised. “Really? I mean, really talk to it about its feelings and everything?”

At my horrified expression, he snorted, then quickly schooled his face to something only mildly amused. 

I said, stiffly, “I will discuss its options with it and ascertain what it needs to integrate here or see if it would prefer somewhere else.”

“Thank you, SecUnit,” Ratthi said. His voice was affectionate, and I had one of those undefinable … feelings. 

I quickly turned away and found that 3 had left its original position on my first ping and was nearby. I left without a word and found it walking towards the government admin block. I walked over and stood next to it. We both gazed over at one of the public docks. 

I initiated a connection: _query: status?_

3 replied: _status: situation within normal parameters…I think. Your humans are healthy and seem content. They keep asking questions that I don’t know the answers to. Questions about my feelings and plans and what I want and how am I doing—_ it was growing distressed. 

I interrupted, _I know there is no protocol for all of that. These humans are not from the Corporate Rim and have their own ways of interacting with constructs. Actually, the only other construct they’ve ever dealt with is me, so you can see why they have no clue._

 _That explains much_ , 3 responded. Was that sarcasm? I ignored it for the time being.

_You were incredibly effective and skillful on my extraction. You are very good at that. Does it give you a sense of satisfaction to do that work well?_

__3 paused for a long 2.7 seconds. _Yes, it was good working with the humans and the transport pilot._

_Is there anything that feels good like that here on the planet?_ I asked.

Another, even longer pause. _There is very little here that requires the amount of computing power or physical strength that I have. I feel … underutilized._

So now we were getting somewhere. Unlike my half-assed efforts, 3 actually took pride in his work. _What are your thoughts about working with the humans on this planet?_

 _They don’t understand the dangers of interacting with us. They move suddenly, try to grasp at me, make unexpected loud noises. It is unnerving. I—_ it paused again— _am terrified that I will hurt one of them._

 __I replied _, I understand; even without my governor module, the idea that I could hurt a client—friend, whatever, still frightens me._

_Really? If you weren’t so socially ill at ease—don’t look at me, ART said it once and you even agreed when we were on our way here—you would be a legend among your… friends. Even with the awkwardness, they think that you are a Combat SecUnit, SecSystem, and SuperComputing Entity wrapped up in one insuperable body._

__Wow, it’s vocabulary was much better than mine. It must have paid attention to some of those education updates that were constantly being pushed out.

_You know how I learned so much about humans? Through watching really entertaining media. ART and I watch it ever chance we can. It is highly unrealistic, but you learn about human society, how they view themselves and how they view bots and constructs, even through the nonsense. It has kept me sane on many mind-numbing assignments._

__I sorted through some of my favorites, created a helpful code bundle index, and sent it to 3 through the feed.

_This will help me to discover what I want?_

_Fuck, no. It just gives you something fun to do while you figure it out. In fact, there is some sort of gathering with the humans this evening, but after, ART and I are going to start World Hoppers from episode 1. Care to join us?_

__3 hesitated. _I do not understand. This activity serves no purpose in protecting or assisting the humans. It is just something that you do for yourself?_

 _You got it, friend,_ I responded flippantly.

_I still do not understand. But I acknowledge and will attend._

__It was a stupid plan, as plans went. But ART and I were going to watch the series anyway, and who knows what effect it might have on a SecUnit newly freed from corporate control?

Wait, I did know. 

Oh, what the hell. Let’s do it anyway.


End file.
